It is very easy to continue modelling the same type of models or even the same model year in year out and not actually make any real progress so much so that it all becomes rather boring and a bit stale. I for one have done that over the last 3 or 4 years and although they have bought me some enjoyment after all it is nice to get some thing finished however there has been nothing to test my skills as a modeller, I guess for me it has made it easier to get things completed and onto the table at Telford every year by removing the fear factor which is something that has been prevalent in my modelling for quite a long time, maybe even back to the mid 90’s. In all honesty I do not really know where or when the fear factor crept in and it is not something worth pondering I just need to give it the old heave ho and get back to completing models on a regular basis and not using every excuse under the sun as a reason not to be at the bench and hardly finishing anything that I start. I look back at the last 20 or so years quite embarrassed at my modelling output having started more models than those that have been completed some of which collect dust on the shelf of shame and some that have got broken during years of being moved around and have found themselves in the bin, sad but true.
As I sit here thinking about all that wasted modelling time and feeling ashamed about all the missed opportunities and all the money I have spent creating a stash that would not look out of place as stock in a model shop, and I ask what is it all for, I could say that it is for my retirement however what would happen if say I got arthritis or lost my hand in an accident, you could say what is the likelihood?, what are the chances of that happening, well sadly I had a power saw accident some years ago and it only takes one lapse in concentration and bang, or chop and you are waving your hand and any chances of finishing off any of the models in the stash goodbye. Some might say that it is essential to have some models sitting doing nothing, you know just in case you may need them, for me they have become a bit of white elephant, maybe in some way a psychological barrier to becoming a more prolific modeller, I have so much choice that it becomes almost impossible for me to choose what to build next and what does not help is the rate at which new models are released. I always start every January by saying that no models will be added to the stash this year and that usually lasts until the first shows are visited and I come back with at least one every time and try as I may my resolve just melts away.
So with an intimidating stash, too much choice and time in short supply I have a bit of a conundrum, how can these issues be dealt with and how can I get back to doing more than 2 or 3 models a year and halt this only building for Telford cycle and get some models finished and ready for the upcoming shows that I display at, well I am trying to thin the stash by moving on those projects that I am just never going to get round to doing, it is no easy task yet something that needs to be done, I am also going through the shelf of shame and getting shot of anything that is broken and is not worth persevering with and concentrate on getting all those ready for paint, painted, finished and ready to be displayed. That hopefully will remove the psychological block that I seem to have and bring me back to a more prolific phase and help remind me that my hobby is to be enjoyed and not something to struggle with, a way to relax away from the daily pressures of life. On reflection there is so much I could have achieved since I started modelling back in the early 90’s that has not been achieved and it makes me feel disappointed in myself about that fact and it is only me that can do anything about it. With all this in mind the other evening while trying my best to avoid the workbench I wrote myself a little list of some of the things that I have not achieved yet would like to, I have never successfully painted a figure, painted a bust, built a diorama, a vignette or an aeroplane, or painted camouflage on a vehicle, I could go on, it’s a damning list of personal disappointments that truly represents my meagre lack of modelling output over the last 30 years.
So here I am contemplating that first step out of my safe modelling place and out into the wider world and away from the comfort zone, writing about all my short comings will hopefully help to focus the mind and get me started on the right track. When at Telford late last year 2 of my fellow club members that should remain anonymous but then why should they, Keith and Andy convinced me that we should all build a Gaspatch models Henschel Hs 123 in Condor Legion colours and I was not even drunk as I do not partake it such things so after parting with 40 of my hard earned pounds on said kit and I have to say it does looks like a lovely kit, yet I view it with a certain suspicion as it will be a huge step outside the comfort zone and of course it scares me somewhat yet on the other hand I am kind of looking forward to it as I do have other aircraft models in my stash and you never know it may just be the catalyst to propel me and my modelling in a new direction. There is maybe one stumbling block to success, I have not built an aircraft since before I was a teenager but hey what could possibly go wrong???. Watch this space…
The Average Modeller