I was sitting at the workbench the other lunchtime castigating myself for never finding enough time to start something new or complete an old project and my thoughts turned to how I never seem to find the time to model. Now I do not have a normal job that has normal hours I have to tolerate a split shift, now it is not something that is new to me as I have spent the best part of 19 years doing it. There is also the issue of living on site, this brings up all sorts of issues and the biggest being that if you do not go out during your ‘break time’ you never leave work which in itself makes it feel like your whole life revolves around the job. Throw into the mix the fact that my partner and I live across 2 houses so we need to do all the things normal people do twice and that does not include shelling out for everything twice too. Then there are numerous other things that are calling out for your attention, there are all the household chores, the gardens, shopping, the washing the washing up, washing the car, walking the dog, the list seems endless. I am making excuses of course, when it boils down to it I am a lazy modeller and it is my own lack of motivation and complete lack of time management that is the problem. I saw a post on Facebook earlier on my model clubs page by my friend and fellow bulldog Andy Langridge of a tank he had taken down from the ‘shelf of shame’ and had completed in a 3 week time span, I have to admit I felt a pang of jealousy for his drive to rid his life of unfinished projects and clear the way to start a brand new project later in the year. Now I could deviate from my current ramblings about time and go off on a tangent about shelves of shame and the like however I feel that deserves a topic all of its own, I will say that whenever I remove a box from the shelf of shame or rather the pile of shame and embarrassment which is what mine is called I just end up peering into the box wondering where on earth I was with the project when I last peered in the box and I just end up scratching my head and popping the lid back on and putting it back into the pile where it came from.
Back to the subject at hand, I popped myself into the workroom chair this afternoon, I thought an hour tinkering at the workbench would be a nice deviation from all the chores I had done today it is true to say that there is a never ending list of things that need your attention, after putting about 30 clocks and hour forward in work this morning, no easy task as the majority are radio controlled and should alter themselves yet they do not for reasons only known to them and they refuse to share this info with me, washing up and tidying the kitchen, ironing for work tomorrow and a touch of gardening, I was ready for a bit of me and bench time. Now I will be honest with you, I went in sat down put the desk lights on, pressed play on the ipod and just sat there blankly, finally got myself some modelling time and there was nothing there…… all the tools were ready, the new pots of glue were waiting in the wings and all I could do is sit and stare blankly at the cutting mat. As the minutes ticked by I looked at my piles of shame and embarrassment, nothing jumping out at me there, I looked around the room just hoping something would jump out and inspire me, maybe a quick build would do, nothing doing there either, maybe I should start one of the numerous builds for Novembers Scale Model World nothing happening there either, my eyes scanned the walls and I came up empty, the old Airfix Sepecat Jaguar I purchased a few years back in a moment of nostalgic weakness caught my eye briefly, oh the memories of a long past Christmas present long gone now to the big plastic model home in the sky. So after an hour of just sitting pondering and feeling the frustration of yet another lost opportunity, feeling despondent I switched off the ipod and the lights, pushed my chair under the desk and came out and closed the door. I have come to realise in all honesty that it is not just about never finding the time it is about being inspired and using that time to get into that workroom and make the most of that same time to break open a box and glue some plastic together, finish off an old project or start a new one.
The Average Modeller